Annie’s A2 Work : Main Task : TASK

First Edit:

Screen Shot 2017-01-23 at 10.51.19

What Went Well:

  • My actors were all on time and really reliable
  • I managed to film all of my initial shots

What Didn’t Go Well:

  • The lighting in the cabin wasn’t very continuous
  • The employees at the phone shop asked us to stop walking in and out of the door because it gave them false numbers of customers, so I couldn’t finish filming in the phone shop
  • I didn’t film enough shots to make the story make complete sense

How I Could Improve:

  • Adapt my initial storyboards to enable it to make sense
  • Do any additional filming to get all shots done
  • Opening sequence needs to be sped up
  • Bandaging sequence needed development
  • More CUs and ECUs are needed to build up mania
  • Repetition of shots to build up mania
  • Inset crying noise when phone is dropped
  • Static image/reverse image when bandaging
  • While watching YouTube video – phone could be giggling/heartbeat?
  • Image of clock and time passing on
  • Making cup of tea – puts cup down, checks phone
  • Framing of coffee shop scene needs improvement – re-film.

I’m not going to ask for an audience response for my first edit because I know what I need to improve upon and I know what I need to re-film.

Second Edit:

 What Went Well:

  • I did a lot of additional filming so the story was a little less simple
  • I like the beginning of the film with the static and shot of the phone merging into a shot of the girl
  • Due to additional filming the framing in the coffee shop is a lot better

What Didn’t Go Well:

  • I didn’t get every shot done during the day that I did additional filming, because I needed to film a shot where the girl got in the car to drive into town and I needed to film a shot of a clock time lapse
  • The bandaging scene was really difficult to edit. I couldn’t get it to reverse quick enough, so this will need some work
  • I didn’t manage to find good sound in time for the second edit deadline

How I Could Improve:

  • FILM/RE-FILM MORE SHOTS!!
  • Spend more time on editing and searching for sound

Third Edit:

What Went Well:

  • Editing is going well
  • I have added more sound
  • My shots are a bit better

What Didn’t Go Well:

  • I didn’t get to finish my entire edit so a lot of things still need to be done
  • Some shots are too long

How I Could Improve:

  • Crop cabin and phone shots
  • Edit in more sound
  • Align the arial shot of Hannah’s eyes – it’s not straight
  • Make credits less simple
  • Take out the shot of Hannah leaving the kitchen – it’s not necessary
  • Speed some of the sequences
  • Re-film phone shots

Fourth Edit

What Went Well:

  • I really like the opening sequence
  • I have added even more sound
  • I have cropped the phone shots and a few other shots to make my actor more centre-frame

What Didn’t Go Well:

  • I kept making mistakes on Final Cut, e.g. cropping clips on the wrong side so it messed the sound up
  • I don’t like the sequence in the middle – the sound and the shots don’t fit together

How I Could Improve

  • Re-film the phone shots on a white background
  • Film Hannah getting a bandage out of a first aid kit
  • Film a time-lapse of a clock to fit with the tea sequence
  • Add more sound

Fifth Edit

What Went Well:

  • I have improved the majority of the sequence – the editing flows better
  • I have finalised my title and credit sequences
  • I have made the shots after the phone breaking shot black and white to suggest that her phone was her identity

What Didn’t Go Well:

  • I still haven’t managed to add the sound of someone on the other side of the phone call
  • The baby laughs at the beginning make it sound like she’s ignoring a baby in the room

How I Could Improve:

  • I need to record someone saying something scary/creepy on the other side of the phone call
  • I need to re-film some shots to make the sequence even clearer – e.g. a shot of Hannah walking into the coffee shop before we see her inside the coffee shop, and a shot of Hannah getting a first aid kit so it doesn’t abruptly cut to her bandaging the phone once it’s broken
  • Make the glitch effect clearer at the end of the sequence
  • Add a glitch effect on the font in both the title and the credit sequence
  • Make the blogger video shorter
  • Remove the notification noise at the beginning of the sequence

Audience Response:

Screen Shot 2017-03-07 at 13.42.20

This audience response tells me that I need to edit the baby laughing noises at the beginning to make it clearer that the phone is the one making the noises and there isn’t a baby in the room that Hannah is ignoring

Sixth Edit

What Went Well:

I have added a glitch effect to the title sequence to further portray the glitch motif that is seen throughout the short film.

What Didn’t Go Well:

I still haven’t perfected the sound. It doesn’t all fit together, but I’m finding it really difficult to find the perfect sound for my piece.

How I Could Improve:

I need to add sound at the end of short film, as it is lacking emotion and pace. Furthermore, I need to make sure all of the sound fits together and doesn’t end abruptly, like the heartbeat and breathing does in the phone shop sequence. I also need to crop the final scene where the character is crying outside, because it isn’t obvious that she is crying due to the colour and distance of the shots.

Seventh Edit

What Went Well:

I’ve changed the sound slightly to see if it fit together better. I like how the piano music sets a nice ambient vibe at the beginning, and then when the phone breaks it becomes really sad which is stressed by the use of the harp. I have also cropped the crying shot so it is a close-up rather than a medium close-up. This stresses to the audience that the character is definitely crying. Furthermore, I listened to my audience comments and made sure to make the improvements that they suggested.

What Didn’t Go Well:

I’m not sure if the sound is perfect, as my audience may think it doesn’t fit well with the narrative and ruins the pace of the film, especially at the end. I also haven’t been able to find a sound for the fantasy shot where the character gets the phone call, but I don’t know if my audience will think much of it.

How I Could Improve:

I need to take into account what my audience members say about the sound for this edit. This will tell me whether I need to change it for my next edit or not, and if it fits well together.

Final Edit

Reflection:

Overall, I’m quite happy with my final piece. I feel like the sound fits a lot better, and rounds up the entire short film. I really like how the narrative makes sense, and the continuity works a lot better now that I have added the shots of the first aid kit. I think that I could’ve organised myself a bit better in planning the entire project, because it did mean that I was quite far behind at the beginning, however I overcame this and caught up by spending a lot of time on the project. I have definitely learned from my mistakes.

15 thoughts on “Annie’s A2 Work : Main Task : TASK”

  1. Overall, very creative second edit, it’s great! The beginning is really good but it looks a bit like horror (which isn’t a problem I guess).
    Unfortunately, the phone shots of the messages aren’t close enough to read if the film is being watched on a phone, which hopefully it shouldn’t be by the examiners but just letting you know. At 1:17 there is a continuity problem but I’m not quite sure how that could be helped.. and at 1:32 maybe cut off just a second before your actress goes out of the kitchen again?
    I love the idea of the phone making crying baby sounds, that’s really effective! Also your ending shot is really good and makes the audience feel really sorry for the girl.

  2. Great film and definitely got my heart beating fast especially at the beginning. It is clearly linked to feeling excessive anxiety, so the storyline makes sense. I am not too sure what the text said towards the beginning, but I saw that it was from ‘Mum’, which, as she smiled, led me to infer that she felt safe and secure with her mum and free from her anxiety. Overall it is very intriguing and I would love to see more!x

  3. A great short film so far very thought provoking, I can see you’ve done a lot of additional filming so the story was a bit more complex which was nice as it added a layer of anonymity. The opening with the statics creates tension and confusion which is good, also the coffee shop scene is much better than before and a lot more believable. The only negative as you pointed out is just the sound as the filming is all very good but it needs the sound to tie everything in and make it more immersive. Overall great second edit.

  4. Great 3rd edit! I love the beginning, the typewriter sound as the writing comes up on the screen is really good and the music works really well. As well as that, the sound of a message being sent at the same time as the title is great and really fits with the rest of your film. The shots in the kitchen are better and it will work well once some music is added. At 2:23 there needs to be something to explain why the girl is scared as it’s not really clear enough yet. At 2:33 maybe you could add the sound of the baby crying? Overall, really good edit 🙂

  5. I really like the glitch effect that you put throughout your film, also your opening sequence is really good but it would be even better with another font I think. The sound of a text message when the girl turns on the kettle is really good, i’m not too sure about the fast forward bit of her going into the kitchen though.. At 1:58 the acting is really bad so something needs to be done to make it more believable (not too sure what though). I really liked the bit after that and the added sound is great. At 3:20 I don’t know if the lack of music is intentional but I think it’s a bit strange and would be better with some kind of soundtrack. The end music works well and with added credits it will be great. Hope this helps a bit!

  6. 6th edit:
    I think this is really good! It really gets the message across. I like the way that it follows the title, as in it keeps fragmenting etc.
    I’m guessing that the sounds of the baby are referring to the phone, but this wasn’t clear to me until the end (but that might just be me). Maybe the title at the beginning could appear in fragments rather than just a letter at a time? I don’t really understand the call from “unknown” apart from the fact that it meant she broke her phone.
    I hope this helps (sorry if it doesn’t)

  7. Love it! I think the opening and closing credits are done really well, and add a kind of spooky feel to the film from the outset. I think that the sounds are very good and add an effect that makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. I don’t really understand the baby sounds tho? I can’t quite decide if the actress is ignoring a baby, or if it is a flash back, or if it is something to do with the person hacking into her phone? Overall I think it’s fab, and it would definitely intrigue me to watch more!x

  8. I love the opening and the title sequence! But I think your title stays up for a bit too long.
    I much prefer the baby sound now, as it’s very clear that it’s crying only because she’s not holding the phone, but as soon as it’s being used, the happy sounds make it very clear.
    The added first aid kit bit, is very good and there’s not continuity problem.
    When she goes into the phone shop I feel like it might be best if it’s not fast forwards so much, maybe just a little faster than normal speed? Also maybe a little added sound track at the end would help? But then great end credits.
    Overall really strong edit, I’ve just been really picky on details, and it really shows amazing editing skills.

  9. I much prefer this new music! To improve you could try and make the transition at 2:27 slightly smoother, but otherwise the rest is really good. the speed as she goes into the phone shop is much better I think and then make the end credits slightly faster and in sync with the music would make it even better 🙂

  10. The 7th edit is reallly good, the editing is really effective, and the static noises and flickering builds up the suspense! The song choices are good, the piano is really good and kind of eery in a way which pulls the audience in a bit! The baby noises are really good also as they makes it clear what the feel of the scene is! The opening scene with the slowed down movement is really effective at setting the film up as creepy! The whole film is really really good and everything comes together really well to tell the story!

  11. The music works really well throughout, it fits really well at the beginning where theres a build up of emotion. The only thing id say is maybe making the sound a bit more dark and sad at the end of the film when she’s looking at new phones. The baby noises fit really well and it clearly shows that she thinks of it as her baby.

  12. I think it is a really good film with lots of drama, and you can feel the stress and tension when you hear the baby crying, the sound effects are great, from the piano music to the ping of the kettle all helps to keep up the suspense

  13. -The opening shot of your final edit immediately shows that it is going to be a powerful piece. It has the baby noises and sudden cuts associated with surrealism and is cut using static, linking to your theme of social media and the online age.
    -Also really like the opening music
    -The way the baby’s noises change depending on the usage of social media is particularly effective in setting the genre and sending your intended message
    -The change of colour is prominent and reflects the change of emotion by the girl, it would appear she has anxiety from the video she was watching earlier.
    The final scene is much improved, with a heartbeat and static followed by a close up. It makes the scene much more anxious, like the girl is.

  14. Great final edit! The editing in your film is really good. Th music and all the sound effects, really fit your genre and are definitely your strong point . I think the end close up shot is a very good idea as it enables us to see the tears and makes the audience feel more emotional towards this character. Finally your end credits are much better now that they are timed with the music. Well done! 🙂

  15. I really like use of baby noises to personify the phone and to symbolise the character’s emotional connection to it. The use of static puts you on edge and gives it a tense and disjointed feel which makes you feel what the character is feeling. It’s a really good film, well done!!

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Burford School Media Arts